To my gorgeous son Kyle,
Today is your first birthday. Where has the time gone? From the first moment I saw you growing in my tummy to your sweet snores I hear as I write this, you had my heart, I knew the moment I saw you enter this world, and I still know to this day, I was put on this earth to be your Mummy. Nothing in my life makes me prouder and or happier than you and your brother. Waking up to your sweet smile, sparkling eyes and wild hair starts each day off with love and light.
Before you arrived, I remember being so excited but also so terrified. I kept thinking, how can I love another little one as much as I love Callum? How will I share my time, attention, love, my heart? It daunted me so much. I wanted you so so much but I was so afraid I wouldn't be able to give you all of me like you deserved.
The moment they lay you down on my chest, every worry, every fear, it all disappeared. You taught me that my heart is limitless in size. Our first few months together were a blur. There was so much going on. You were the sweetest little baby. You loved your brother, your puppy, snuggling into my chest. Your smile lit up a room, it still does. You are so michevious, a little rascal. You are my sweetness and light. Every time I see your cheeky little grin all I can say is “You’re so delicious!” and my boy you so are!
My favourite moments during the first few months of your life were when you’d fall asleep on me. Nothing was sweeter than your little cheeks squished on my chest. Your little parted lips and your breath that always smelt sweet. I breathed you in so much and will never forget your smell.
You love so many things! Swimming has to be one of your favourite activities. You love falling into Mummy’s arms in the water now. You LOVE being on your back in the water, unlike your big brother! You love your puppy Chloe so much, she is your favourite person in the world! You love crawling and cruising the furniture, you are constantly on the move and we can’t keep up! You love bananas, yogurt, water, cheesies, yogurt melts, blueberries, toast with peanut butter or plain butter! You LOVE to put everything in your mouth. Muffins are one of your favourite snacks. You also love sharing your food with Chloe. You could stay in the bath forever - we love bath time! We love having our ‘Kyle and Mummy Days’.
You love your grandparents! And most importantly you love Mummy and Daddy and we love you more! Your first words were ‘Mum” and “Dada” after all!
There are some things you don’t like, but not many. You don’t like being left alone, but that’s okay, because we’ll never leave you. You don’t like getting changed, being on your back was so 6 months ago! But when we sing to you or tickle you, we get through it. You still don’t like eggs, which Papa doesn't understand because according to him he makes the BEST scrambled eggs!
You are on the move and almost ready to walk, and we can’t wait for you to see life through that view. We’re excited for every stage and milestone. We’re so blessed to have you as our son Prince (a nickname we have had since before we knew you were Kyle).
Darling boy of mine, thank you for this first year. Thank you for teaching me and being patient with me. Thank you for your unconditional love, and your sloppy kisses.
I’ll love you forever, and beyond.
Your Mummy xoxo
”You were second. Not in my heart, but one did come before you in time.
Yes, with you, it was different.
There was no gender reveal party. No elaborate showers.
The worries of a first-time-mum had faded, and now my thoughts drifted to fears that I wouldn’t be enough for you. I wondered how on earth my heart could ever be big enough, how I could manage to divide my time and energy and love equally enough.
And then, before I knew what happened (because, you see, time passes so much quicker the second time around), you were here.
And in an instant, every fear faded.
And that was it. I was yours.
A mum of two. A family of four.
You’ve taught me how to juggle 1,000 balls without completely melting down.
You’ve taught me that kids truly are resilient, and that my love covers so many gaps.
You’ve taught me to slow down. To savour firsts and lasts, and to focus on what’s really important, like drinking in the smell of your hair after a bath, and memorizing your tiny fingers and your perfect baby lips.
You’ve taught me how absolutely strong I can be, and you’ve given me a confidence I lacked the first time around.
But more than anything, my love, you taught me that a heart is absolutely limitless in size, and that love is the antidote to fear.
So, it’s true. You didn’t make me a mother.
But you sure made me a better one.”
